Some have called Frank Warren the most trusted man in America because of his PostSecret Project. Others have dubbed him the person who has seen the most secrets in the world. Warren said he doesn’t know if those statements are true, but what he often finds more meaningful are the secrets he doesn’t get to see.
Many people have written down their secrets on creatively decorated postcards and intended to send them to Warren’s now famous address in Germantown, Md., but instead tore them up. Oftentimes, Warren is notified of this action from his fans, who explain they didn’t send the secret either because simply by writing the secret down they felt a weight lifted, or because they felt ashamed. Others decided to no longer carry the secret with them.
“I think it revels the transformative nature of our secrets,” said Warren. “How they can change us when we share them, or how sometimes when we think we’re keeping a secret, that secret’s actually keeping us.”
The PostSecret Project started in 2004 as a submission to the Artomatic bi-annual arts festival in Washington D.C. Warren handed out 3,000 postcards to strangers on the sidewalk and waited for the submissions to be sent back. From those beginnings, Warren has gone on to receive 1 million postcards and evolve the idea from an art project and traveling art show to five books, a popular website, a speaking tour and soon, a play.
On Tuesday, Feb. 5, Warren gave a keynote presentation at the University at Albany as part of the college’s recognition of Sexuality Month. Many of the secrets Warren receives are sexual in nature or about mental health, while others are humorous and lighthearted.
Warren said while some sexual secrets are discussed during his presentations, like those about intimacy, sexual orientation or abuse, he hoped the event would allow students to feel more free to talk about their concerns, questions or desires about sex.
“I think that’s one of the reasons they have a sexual recognition month,” he said before the show. “I think sometimes there are important issues that get suppressed down as secrets, but instead if we brought them up and explored them, we’d be more likely to find a solution together.”
But students were also interested in Warren’s project itself.
All postcards are sent to him anonymously from people around the world and Warren said its very important to him that people are allowed to keep their anonymity so the secrets remain real and the project remains a nonjudgmental space.
“I think there’s something about secrets that is inexhaustible and as long as I’m true to the project and maintain a relationship where people trust me with their secrets, I think the project has infinite life,” said Warren. “And for me it’s been a joy to follow where it’s led me. This project has found me and turned my world upside down.”
Warren reads each of the secrets and said he hasn’t grown bored of it. He’s no longer surprised by what he reads, but some more painful secrets can feel burdensome. The secret collector said the two most common secrets he receives are admissions to urinating in the shower, and the sharing of a desire to find the one person the writer can share their whole self with.
“I see that secret dozens of times over,” said Warren. “The idea about finding that one person we can show our true selves to and no longer have to keep secrets from.”
In his program, Warren told the audience one of his own secrets and how he relates to some of the postcards he receives. He later asked the audience to tell some of their secrets live in front of the group. Some spoke of depression, or feeling unaccepted by family and friends.
“I think one of the reasons I’m comfortable with that is because I’ve been doing it for years, but also because before I started this I was answering phones on a suicide hotline and I feel parallels between the two,” he said. “In fact, I feel myself falling into the same voice, just nonjudgmental and empathic. That’s the voice I fall into out there.”
Through the PostSecret books and Warren’s speaking engagements, more than $1 million dollars have been donated to suicide prevention charities. Warren said he hopes the project will allow people to seek the help they need and give a voice to those who need it in order to prevent tragedy.
“We all have secrets and everyday we decide what to do with them,” Warren said.
To mail a secret to the PostSecret Project, send a postcard to Frank Warren at 13345 Copper Ridge Road, Germantown, MD 20874.
To visit PostSecret.com click here.