Luke Donovan’s childhood was, at the very least, a bit odd.
Donovan grew up living with a mentally ill grandmother, experienced relentless bullying throughout high school, started hearing voices in his head at the age of 18 and at one point contemplated suicide.
“Trying to be thankful for everything I had in my life, that helped me (get through it),” said Donovan, a 2001 graduate of Colonie Central High School.
The years of pain are why he wrote “Missing the Big Picture,” an autobiography that was published at the end of March.
“It’s been a goal of mine for the past 10 years,” said Donovan. “It’s a personal memoir and starts when I was born up until a couple years ago when I was in my mid-20s. … I thought it would be a good book to share to help people in down situations.”
He said the book can be graphic as it follows his convoluted and complex life, but that honesty and candor was necessary to truly tell his story.
“The message is to show struggling young people that feel sad, depressed or suicidal that you can triumph over what is bothering you,” said Donovan.
And triumph he did. Donovan said it took years of hard work but facing his childhood, adolescence and eventual independence through note taking played a part in coming to terms with himself and where he came from.
Donovan’s childhood was one big obscure schedule, dictated by his grandmother.
“We could only do laundry Sundays at 7:40,” said Donovan. “She revolved around time. If we were out shopping and came home at a bad time we had to wait in the car until she said it was okay for us to come in.”
He said he thought the compulsiveness was normal and kept it to himself. When he got older, though, Donovan said he began to gain perspective on his home life, and it affected him.
“I think that kind of opened the door to being passive and that’s where my relationships with my peers led; I was taken advantage of … bullying throughout the years mainly in high school and I had former friends that I had issues with,” said Donovan.
When he turned 18, Donovan started hearing voices.
“I was hearing a classmate’s voice. … I thought I was talking to people through my mind,” said Donovan. “I was a normal kid one day, then all of a sudden my grades dropped massively. It was very hard to function, go to school, work, it just consumed my whole mindset.”
Once he started taking medication, the voices stopped, and by the time he was past his mid-20s, Donovan had banished his demons and was on the road to a much different life that he never saw coming.
“I was an outsider mostly all of my life but it’s nice being onstage and realizing I can make people laugh,” said Donovan.
Donovan is a stand up comic. He won the Capital District’s Last Comic Standing competition last year, and performs locally. He gets his material from work, friends and “people doing stupid stuff.” In a way, the creative outlet is therapeutic for him and his audience.
“It’s a good time where people can relax and laugh away what’s bothering them for a minute or however long the show is,” said Donovan. “They’re looking at you and you’re just trying to make them laugh.”
Melissa Merrill said she and Donovan are close friends but she didn’t know much about his personal history until reading his book.
“I was completely shocked. … I thought it was wonderful for him to write something like that and to talk about bullying like he did, especially for boys a lot of people cover that stuff up and are kind of ashamed of it,” said Merrill.
Just like he wants his jokes to help someone, Donovan said “Missing the Big Picture” will hopefully do the same. In fact, it already has.
“Someone called me and thanked me for writing this because he felt the same way,” said Donovan. “As men we’re not trained to express feelings, it was a sign of weakness. I think that’s most important,” said Donovan.
Merrill said she thinks Donovan’s openness is what will touch people and help them open up, too.
“He didn’t hold much back. He described his history in detail and I think that’s a good thing. He’s open and honest, which is what people want to see.”
“Missing the Big Picture” is available at amazon.com, The Book House in Stuyvesant Plaza and Barnes and Noble.
