by THERESA DAVIS
So you picked an adoption agency to work with. Yay! You’ve started your adoption journey. Now comes paperwork. Lots and lots of paperwork.
I empathize with you if you are a private person, because that’s gone now. Thorough background checks will be done on everyone living in the household. Your finances will be looked at, everything. By the time I was at the end of this process, I was expecting a record of the times I made a bathroom visit.
You will get completely stressed and overwhelmed. Ask questions. Don’t be afraid or feel ashamed about what “type” of kid you want. You will be asked. Agencies want to make sure the placement will be a good fit.
If you’re not comfortable with a certain religion, personality trait, behavior, etc. it’s OK. You’re not a terrible person. Just be aware that babies turn into teenagers; people change and may do things you don’t agree with. You will need to be flexible and have an open mind.
For you folks who choose foster care, not only is there paperwork but also training. At least several hours of training. You will hear terrible things and hear of strange behaviors. At this stage I urge you to stop and be honest with yourself. Can you handle bedwetting? How about a teenager who wets the bed? Can you handle food being thrown, gobbled, refused? What about hoarded food? You may find it everywhere, or you may not know it’s there until you smell it.
Can you handle a toddler or a preschooler who is almost completely self-sufficient and acts like an adult? There’s more, friends, lots more. But you can do it; anyone can. The real question is do you want to?
When your paperwork is completed, filed, and approved, you’re almost there. While this goes on, you will have a home study. Think you’re stressed now? See you in a month or two…
