feeds
I had another scare. I had an MRI and was told I’d have to have surgery because of a blockage in the renal artery to my right kidney, which was probably the cause of my recent sky high blood pressure.
I went to see a specialist and underwent a renal ultrasound scan. The results were negative. It turns out I don’t need surgery after all. Of course, I was confused about two different sets of results.
Emotionally wrought, I asked the Chief of Vascular Surgery: “Now, you’re sure I don’t need surgery.” He’s been at this for over 20 years and has done hundreds of such surgeries. “Yes, I’m sure and no, you don’t need surgery,” he says, patiently.
Breathe… it’s a weight off my mind, but there are still no answers to why my blood pressure has gone up so sharply.
Next up, I’m going to have some tests on my adrenal glands. I feel like my body is a giant jigsaw puzzle and my doctors have filled in two pieces, but there are gaping holes.
In the meantime, thanks for your concern, thoughts and good wishes. I’ll keep you posted after my upcoming appointment with the hypertension specialist.
Stick and Stones and Words.
There’s an edge in the air. Listen to the words around us. It’s a global financial meltdown. People are worried and anxious. I haven’t dared to look at our retirement accounts choosing instead, as I’ve never done before, to bury my head in the sand. I’m listening to the financial experts who say we have 20 plus years before retiring, so sit tight.
The experts argue that banks need to have trust and confidence for things to shift in this economic crisis. Why do I feel, more keenly than I’ve done in the past, such words or values are lacking in our world and community?
How do we get out of this mess? Does it come down to the words: trust, hope and leap of faith?
Listen to the torrents of words in this presidential election. I’m sad and concerned about the negative and incendiary tones used recently. There’s palpable anger in many of the audiences listening.
I’m an immigrant who wants to be a citizen. I love that America is made up of immigrants and descendants of immigrants, but now I feel let down. It seems for some, you can be born here and not be American enough. What is American enough? Even if I become a citizen, will I ever be American enough?
My children were born here and are citizens. Will they be American enough? They have different names, look different and have a different background. Will they forever have to explain and justify they have parents from England and grandparents from Hong Kong; they were born in Albany, New York and now integrating as Nasvillians? I thought we were a nation of immigrants, but now I find there are shades of immigrants.
In One Word.
I remind myself for all the negative people, there are as many good people in the world and I’ve witnessed some lately in Nashville.
I’m re-reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s book “Eat, Pray, Love” and there’s a part where she describes an Italian friend who believes that each place has a single word that defines it. For example, the word for New York City is “achieve” and for Los Angeles, it’s “succeed.”
Reflecting back on the last three months, I sum up Nashville as “affable.” I’ve encountered pleasant, friendly and easy-going people who stop and answer questions or chat to a stranger with a welcoming smile.
I’ve met new friends who, after only a few weeks’ acquaintance, sat with me and comforted me during my medical crisis in the ER; brought me prepared meals so I didn’t have to cook in the days following my emergency; looked after my children; left welcoming and reassuring messages; bought me a gift certificate for a massage because of all I’d been through; shared their knowledge and contacts generously; chatted over coffee; said yes to play dates and welcomed me into their group. That’s kindness; that’s love and love is a powerful word.
I look back over the last eight years in Albany, New York and I call my old home, “grit.” The Capital District is the essence of determination, perseverance and tenacity. I admire people’s bravery and sense of humor in the daily challenges of their lives.
The friends I’ve made in the Capital District are my family. I feel their love and kindness from their encouraging emails and phone calls to notes and parcels filled with goodies sent to cheer me up. I miss the people and, as I’ve learned over the years in saying goodbye to close friends in the UK, friendships transcend distance, place and time.
Last Words.
During this period of fear, panic and uncertainly, maybe, the only thing we can do is to counteract with love, trust and hope.
Let’s share our words of hope, so we don’t abandon optimism (the quality I so admire about Americans.) Optimism is the one thing I’ve always carried within me and have forgotten in my struggle with relocation and health issues.
SUSAN S. CHEUNG
